Dreaming up goals/Learning from failure

This summer I am starting anew- a new adventure, a new way of thinking about lire and work, a new way of being. This summer, as my own intern, I will spend my days working / hustling for myself and on the behalf of clients I love. I will figure out how to get the benefits of the internship experience without going into the office. That being said, my internship experience will be called FREELANCE CREATIVE. It will focus on fully understanding this rapidly burgeoning new way of work through teachers (the books and mentors I interact with), workdays (through creating my own freelance schedule and deciding what type of work I want and don’t want), classes (the things I learn), and lifestyle (I want to fully embrace the ways that many freelance creatives get to live their lives through a location independent lifestyle and time dedicated to hobbies). Specifically, I will be launching a creative freelancer business that focuses on providing travel, career and women’s publications/organizations with writing, public speaking and programming. Whew…thats a mouthful. I am making this decision and to be honest… I feel free! Free to make my own decisions, free to use the summer doing what I want to do, and free to gain professional and personal experiences that I can still put on a resume. I’m looking forward to a great summer!! How about you? What are your plans? Are you launching your own business, working all summer, or doing an internship? No shame here! Post back, and make sure to keep reading 😊

Creating Goals That Don’t Suck (Part 1)

I always begin by thinking about the outcome- what can this summer do for me, what can I supply clients with this summer, how do I want to feel by the end of the summer? I am an avid bookworm so luckily an author gave me the perfect system to plan my goals.

The Desire Map by Danielle Laporte is an amazing book! It taught me so much about who I am, and what I want, and I would highly recommend it to anyone who wants to stop crying at night over failure.

The whole point of the book is that people chase feelings, not things; and your mission is to find the CDF (or the Core Desired Feelings) that guide your life- and then create goals that are aligned with them. They can be worded strangely or in any way you want, and they can be anything you want.

MY CDF include:
Freedom– ripping up to do lists, spontaneous action followed by the indescribable feeling of light and fire at the same time

Ebullience- a bubbling over of my joy that touches anyone who interacts with me- when people call me cheerful it is one of my favorite compliments

Inspired- filled up with so much love and juice for my work that I can’t keep it inside and must produce and produce and produce

In Conversation- a constant discussion with the world and myself, thinking about what I believe in and helping others in any way I can, sensing and recognizing signs and opportunities

Fantastical- melting in the magic of books and tales and made up creatures that remind me of the power of imagination, believing in more than meets the eye

The Black Feminine- connecting with who I am as a black woman; creating spaces for others to heal and challenge themselves; my love for social justice

Have you ever read the Desire Map? What are the feelings you want to feel everyday in your life and work? Stay tuned for “Creating goals that don’t suck PART2” where I’ll make my goals for my #internofme summer!

Creating Goals that Don’t Suck (Part 2)

My core desired feelings are Ebullient,  in conversation,  inspired,  fantastical and the black feminine.  If you have no idea what I’m talking about then go back to part 1.
When you are your own intern, you no longer have to play by the rules…so I’m not going to with this entry. Rather than railing off a list of goals that are material based,  I am going to focus on the feelings that I want to feel in my life and work. These are goals that set me on fire- that make me focus on my dreams rather than my fears.


Stick to a loose schedule that does not require long hours of working in a row

Only say yes to projects and clients that you adore

Travel to a new place at least once a month (this I will have no issue with since I am going to Sweden, Denmark and Canada over the next three months!)


Volunteer/give back to a charity I believe in

Act the way I want to feel

Eat well and move your body regularly

In Conversation

Don’t ignore synchronicity- take notice of the recurring signs and opportunities in life

Read as many books as possible and read everyday

Meet as many people as possible


Create 1-2 products that you are proud of
Challenge your inspiration by writing everyday…whether the muse visits you or not


Interact with one thing that would be considered fantastical a day… Whether that includes reading a science fiction book or going to a fairy exhibit at a museum

Take a chance and live out your life’s fantasy; have an unapologetic and unconditional belief in your ability to do this

The Black Feminine

Connect with, and advocate for, women

Read books by women of color

Create a product that empowers women of color

My marked up copy of “The Desire Map”- a book that is guiding my goal making process

Journal Entry # 4: Building from Failure- Know who you are, Know what you want

In the fall of 2015, I started my own freelance writing business. I ran my business every Tuesday and Thursday out of my dorm room, where I would wake up at 9 am and pitch and read and write and pitch until 12. Then I would take a break till 2 before going back to pitching, reading and writing for the rest of the day util 5.

I’m not exaggerating when I say that each day was simply MISERABLE. I would wake up near tears and look at my work desk with disgust. I wasn’t inspired. I rarely, if ever, actually worked a full day. I would often give up and watch ‘Family Guy’, and I would stay in my room the whole day so that my friends wouldn’t ask me “how the writing was going.”

There were a few things that I learned from this experience, but two things in particular really stood out to me. In order to run a successful #internofme experience, you need to:

Know who you are AND Know what you want

Sounds easy enough right? Well, not so much. When you’re just starting out, it’s easy to take the opinions and mindsets of everyone who gives you advice. One book I read told me about the importance of a strict schedule, and that was what influenced my 9-5 work day. However, I soon learned that even if I was doing something I loved, a 9-5 was just not my thing! Many freelance professionals work late into the night or work only four hours a week, and outsource the hell out of their business. I realized then how important it is to create a schedule that works with who I am as a person, and what I want.

Another thing- I am an avid needy, people-person who is a connector before anything else! I bring people together- whether that’s for great events, for talks, for networking. All that good people based stuff is right up my alley, so it gets very hard for me to be alone for long periods of time. When I realized how much I hated being alone for the full days of freelance writing- I made sure to add a connector portion to my business, and add more meetings, meetups, conferences and networking sessions into my schedule.

Last year’s failure taught me a lot about myself, and now as I begin my internofme summer, I am tailoring my work days to reflect the type of person I am, and the type of experiences I want.

In the spirit of knowing who I am, and knowing what I want- I’m going to spend a bit of time today brainstorming exactly what those things are! And that- I assure you- is always time well spent


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